Why Not Me? - US Snowshoe National Championships Report

As a youngster, I was a competitive cross country skier.  I raced through the high school level making the Massachusetts team to compete in the New England Championships, and through the collegiate level where my team annually competed at the Collegiate National Championships.  I still follow xc skiing, and was inspired when two members of the USA Ski Team made the podium at the World Championships earlier this week (Silver - Jessie Diggins, Bronze - Caitlin Gregg).  In an interview post-race, Jessie said "We've never had U.S. girls podium at a distance event at the World Champs and to have two?  It's incredible.  We talked at the team meeting last night and I said, 'Why not me?' I knew today I had great skis.  And I skied my heart out to create the opportunity."

Her words resonated with me, as I mentally prepared for the 2015 US Snowshoe Nationals in Eau Claire, Wisconsin.  Why not me?  Why couldn't it be me who races well?  Why do I count myself out before the race has even begun?  My mantra leading up to the race was 'why not me'.  Those three words captured everything I wanted to believe and achieve.

(Rocking the Inov8 Trail Ultras, and Dion 121s)

For me, the 2015 US Snowshoe National Championships was an opportunity for redemption over last year's results (15th place finish).  I was also excited about the addition of a half marathon event, and was planning to 'do the double' by racing the 10k on Saturday and half marathon on Sunday.  While I didn't get in a ton of snowshoe racing this season in preparation, my snowshoe training was plentiful and I felt strong.

(There was minimal snow coverage, often time just a narrow ribbon of snow to run on.)

Saturday morning started with the men's 10k race - so I cheered on the race while I tried to prepare myself.  The course was rolling (but with no big hills), and had minimal snow coverage which lead to some fast times.  It wasn't exactly playing into my strengths, but I did my best to stay positive.

(Early in the Women's 10k race, I am in the middle of the lead pack)

Soon enough, the ladies 10k race was lining up and getting under way.  While the lead pack took off immediately, I scurried to catch up (which is typical - my ultrarunning legs take a few minutes to catch up).  The first 1km of the race was wide double track, and there was plenty of jockeying.  As we turned onto the first single track (at 1km), I was in 7th or 8th place in a tight train of the top 10.  We battled for the next 2km of mostly double track and ultimately I found myself in 8th place as we dodged through the trees on the tight single track mountain bike trails.  I felt like I was flying - but the tight tracks and close trees might have been giving that illusion.

The next km of the course brought us through some single track with a huge 180-degree turn, and I was surprised to see that the leaders were only about 30 seconds ahead...I was still in the hunt!  I focused on the ladies ahead as I climbs up from the river.  On the next double track, I could still see the leaders not far ahead.  The 4km mark was on a tight squirrelly downhill with a few bare patches where we ran across dirt!  I hesitated on the dirt section, focused on not falling and not breaking a cleat...and between that and the next uphill/downhill section, by 5km I was running alone with no one in sight.

(Early race in the Women's 10k, jockeying for positions)

I glanced back, and couldn't see anyone - I was running in no-mans land.  I'll admit it - at this point, I settled.  I mentally gave up.  I stopped chasing 7th place and started defending 8th place.  I ran controlled, but was thinking of tomorrow's half marathon.  I enjoyed the last 5km of the race, winding around the single track and through the trees...and didn't see another racer.  I finished in 51:09 for 8th place. 

I was immediately thrilled to improve upon my 2014 results - cracking the top 10 in a National Championship is always a challenge.  However, the more I let the result sink in, the more disappointed I was in the result - knowing that I didn't give 100%, knowing that I mentally shut down and ran tactically, knowing that my mental strength still needs some improvement. 

(Enjoying a bit of alone time in no-mans-land)

However, the blessing and curses of a 2-day event is that (negatively) you have to immediately get over any disappointment and focus on the next day but (positively) you immediately have the opportunity to right any wrong.  I had to regroup, refocus, and try again the next day.  It can be a challenging task to turn around and race the next day, especially when I was in the middle of the country and didn't have Brian around to chat with. 

Sunday morning, and I was once again lining up to race a National Championship event.  It wasn't until we had started, and I was looking around my competitors, that I saw that none of the other women in the top 5 had raced the previous day - I had expected that most folks who would race the half marathon would also be on slightly fatigued legs...but I was apparently incorrect with that assumption.  Luckily, one of my training buddies, Erik, also jumped into the half so we ran the first several kms together, gabbing like it was a training run. 

(Start of the inaugural National Championship Half Marathon race)

About 6km in, he asked me if there were any females ahead, and I answered that there was only 1 female ahead of me...but that I was more nervous about the female that was only 15 seconds behind me.  He offered to put in a surge with me, to try to drop her, but I knew I could only do so much...so I wanted to wait and see where she was in another 10km.  He did take the lead and we unintentionally picked it up for a few km of fun rolling single track.  Funny how no matter how tired I might be, I will always open up my stride when I'm having fun and enjoying a trail!  By the end of my first lap, Erik was about 30 seconds ahead and I was, again, running alone...but without the next female in sight behind me I was content to keep cruising.  The first female was long gone ahead of me, so I focused on maintaining 2nd place.

The second lap was pure joy on snowshoes.  I took in the moment, enjoyed the trails we were running, and had fun with the solitude that snowshoeing often brings.  The 3rd place female was within striking distance, so I cheered her on when the trail allowed, but was sure to keep the pressure on to maintain my gap.  I passed a few guys as they faded, but in general was running on my own.  The feeling I got for this lap, however, is exactly why I love snowshoeing - it was completely zen.

(Once again, running on my own through the trees)

I crossed the finish line in 1:59:04, good enough for the silver medal on the day.  I was proud of that accomplishment - my best ever individual National Championship results have been bronzes (at Collegiate Skiing Nationals and the US 50 Mile Trail Champs).  This felt like a break through - I might not have taken the top step...yet...but I took one step higher and proved that I can be among the best in the country.

(Celebrating with my training buddy Erik, who earned a Silver in his age group)

In general, while I'm not 100% satisfied with my results, I am pleased to have gotten some redemption on my 2014 Snowshoe National results.  I am also excited that I got to participate in (and show support of) the snowshoe half marathon at the championships, which I think is a great addition and will (hopefully) attract more of the endurance runners to the event.

2015 World Trail Championships

I cannot express how thrilled I am to have been selected for the USA Trail Team headed to the Trail World Championships this summer!  The championship race will take place in Annecy France, on a technical 86km (about 54 miles) course featuring 17,000 feet of climbing. 

You can read all about the team and the race here...

http://trailrunner.com/trail-news/u-s-team-trail-world-championships-announced/

(Racing at the 2013 World Trail Championships for USA)

 

For me, it was a long time dream to wear a USA jersey and represent my country in a World Championship event.  That dream came true in 2013 (twice) as I was selected for the 2013 World Trail Championships (50 mile race in Wales) and the 2013 World Long Distance Mountain Running Championships (42km race in Poland).  It's hard to believe that I would get another opportunity, but I am honored to have been selected again.

(Racing at the 2013 Long Distance Mountain Running Championships for USA)

 

My 2015 training started on January 1st, and I've been working hard - with the faint hope of team selection motivating me through the cold mornings and snow covered trails.  Now that it's a reality, I have just over 3 months to push myself even harder.

I am incredibly fortunate that I have a wonderful, supportive group of training buddies who have been joining me for training runs, pushing me during my track workouts, and inspiring me to work hard.  I know that they will keep the pressure on so I arrive in France in top form.

(With some of my training buddies before a local road race)

Matters of the Heart

written by Amy

I was standing at the finish line of UTMB, in the center of Chamonix, France, waiting for Brian to finish.  I was so nervous and so excited - Brian was right around 20th place, and could be finishing under 24 hours!  My heart started to beat fast...then it started to skip a beat.  Suddenly, I couldn't concentrate on Brian, I could only think about the long pauses between my heart beats.  I leaned over to get some water, thinking maybe I was dehydrated, and I saw spots as I nearly passed out.  This was supposed to be a glorious moment for my husband and I was the only person in France that he knew to share it with him, yet I was struggling to stay upright as my heart skipped beats and gave abnormally large strokes.  I was freaking out!

That moment passed. 

A few weeks later, I had a similar episode at the starting line for a cross country race with my team.  I nearly passed out as my heart beat an irregular rhythm.  While others were doing striders, I was trying to determine if I there was anyway to do CPR on myself if my heartbeats strung out any longer.  I was seeing spots, and wasn't sure if I should race or sit aside and watch my friends run.  I wasn't confident that I could safely finish the 5k cross country race.

While these were the only two times I felt like I would pass out, I was having weekly episodes of heart palpitations.  I would feel my heart skip a beat, then give a large 'thump' as if to catch up on the next stroke.  It was worrisome, and I had no idea what was causing it.  I was beginning to freak out.  I was afraid to push my body hard, because I didn't know if my heart could take it.  Brian would catch me taking my pulse as I would count the seconds between my heart beats.  At some point in this time, I also learned that our friend Chad died of unexpected heart-related issues, and it spurred me to finally see a doctor to figure out what was going on and make sure I was ok.

I saw my regular doctor, who gave me an EKG and immediately said 'hmmm...I think you need to see a cardiologist'.  I continued to be anxious, since all the doctor relayed was something about a 'short Q-T stroke'.  If you google that term, a host of scary information comes up.  The 6 week wait to see the cardiologist seemed endless - in that time, I continued to run but was literally scared to push the tempo or work too hard.  Dr. Google was doing nothing to calm me down - as a host of scary scenarios pop up anytime I would input my symptoms.  My episodes continued to occur every week or so.  I couldn't find any rational connector for when they were happening - they happened throughout the day, they happened both when running and when resting/relaxing.  As an engineer, it was infuriating to not be able to find the cause or determine anything that would connect when this was occurring.

Finally seeing the cardiologist offered some relief.  He first sat me down and said 'I see you're very concerned, so let me tell you how this is going to happen.  We'll run a bunch of tests, and in the end we'll find that nothing is wrong.  You're healthy, and you'll be ok.'  While I wanted to fully believe him, and think that I was completely healthy and would be ok, one thought kept creeping back in...Chad was seemingly healthy too.

The cardiologist had me wear a portable EKG machine to log my heart beats throughout a normal day.  He told me that I could do whatever was normal, so I went for a run (and sweat the electrodes off) but otherwise the day was uneventful - no episodes while wearing the monitor.  Funny how i was disappointed that i couldn’t have an episode at ny point when the doctor would witness - as if I was worried that the doctor might think I was making it up or was freaking out about nothing.

The following two months, I got a host of other tests - blood tests (which came back normal) and an echocardiogram (or "echo" for short).  The technician giving the "echo" said she couldn't tell me anything from the test - which I suppose is standard, but it's frustrating for someone who's worried.

As all this was going on, I opened up to a several of my trail running friends about what was going on.  The first time was as I was wearing the portable EKG and had to explain to my friends why I had to stop to adjust the electrode pads.  One of the girls with me answered with her own personal story of a heart condition.  On another run, I was with a close friend who I had been training with for years - as I told him about my experience, he relayed that he had similar experiences years ago and went through the same round of tests and doctor visits.  Ultimately, he was fine.  But, it made me wonder how many runners out there have had heart-related issues and don't talk about it?  It wasn't until I opened up to my friends about my experience that I started hearing everyone's stories. 

After all the testing, I finally got to see the cardiologist again to review the results.  It had been about 6 months since my experience at the UTMB finish line.  My appointment was less than 10 minutes - he said that everything looked within the realm of normal.  I have a minor leaky valve in my heart that will likely never be an issue.  Sometimes my heart does an extra beat, which, when that extra beat is early, can account for the feeling of a prolonged time between heart beats.  Apparently,  while my heart will sometimes beat irregularly or skip a beat, it wasn't anything to be concerned about. While the cardiologist's results are reassuring, and nothing is really wrong with me, there's also a feeling of this being an unresolved issue - if I don't know what caused it, how do I know it won't happen again? 

Either way, I overwhelmingly felt alone and isolated as I was going through this process, especially when I first started experiencing these weird heart palpitations.  I had never heard any of my running friends talk about heart issues like that!  Now, I have heard from a few folks who have had similar situations.  It would have been nice to know that, from time to time, other endurance athletes have experienced heart-related issues.  More importantly,  it would have been helpful to hear that other endurance athletes' hearts sometimes do an irregular beat and they are ok.

Of course, if you have any heart concerns, you should see your doctor!